I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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