i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
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