I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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