i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
