I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Of course I have a pirate flag
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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