You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Randomize
