I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Randomize
