While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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