We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
