Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
At least make sure they are 18
Why
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
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