he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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