dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize