problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
