She is in my trunk
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Dignity is for republicans.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
We have started to decorate penises.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize