Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
