This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Randomize
