There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Congratulations! We have a period
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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