I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Randomize
