I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
