if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize
