I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
