She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
