I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
