He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
