Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize