they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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