Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I just want to make out with him forever
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
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