Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
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