what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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