He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
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