The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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