Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Malibu has added tequila to its rum. It's like when two beautiful gaybies come together an spawn a unicorn that only cries jellybean tears.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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