I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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