i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize