Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
We left the knife in your bed.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
