is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just invented taco cereal.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
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