Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
