you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
