i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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