Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
