a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
