Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Randomize
