guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
