You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
