between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I wish they made helmets for livers.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
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