He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Less talking, more tequila
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
