Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
