I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
