Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I'm jealous of your bromance
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize