My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I love you. Go after that dick
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
Randomize
