I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
